I ate breakfast this morning. Sad to admit but it had more calories than the entirety of what I ate yesterday. I didn’t have enough but I did eat.

Today is a new day. I want to try today. Living like I have been lately is going to kill me. I still have hope that I won’t have to be like this forever.

I am going to eat something for lunch today. Something means not just some grapes and carrots but at least trying to hit all of the food groups. I know its going to be hell but I have to try.

I am also going to have dinner. It may be a salad with a bit of steak instead of a whole steak like my family but it is something. I barely eat meat at all for my protein and I’m going to today.

I don’t want to die. This words are huge. Following Ed is killing me both physically and mentally. I am sick of living with Ed. I can’t stand having to wake up everyday only to go through the same thing over and over. I want to be all God has planned and I’m not right now. I am barely able to function each day.

Whatever it takes, I am going to recover.