Thoughts

• How has it been a month since coming home from school? It feels like yesterday and a million years all at once.
•  I feel free. I am not being held back by anything this summer. I have bad days and I struggle but it’s nothing like before. It’s weird not planning my day around exercise and avoiding food.
• I am going to soak the rest of this summer in as much as possible, not let it pass by.
• I wish I never had to work on call shifts. They are not only boring but onely, I love the people I work with and I want to work with them, not alone.

Feelings

• Worried. My hunger has been nearly nonexistent yet again. I really don’t get that because I am working all the time and housekeeping isn’t easy. The last few days it has affected how I’ve eaten. Some brief ED thoughts have persisted but I know I can get past it. R is helping and I will get through this.
• Amazed and thankful. My dad yesterday: “Your mom and I are proud of you. You’re doing better with eating and have energy and are so happy now.” My parents, and my dad in particular have done a 180 when it comes to acceptance and support of my ED and MH.
• Excited. Ludington is coming up already, which is crazy. I’m excited to go home and relax at my favorite place in the entire world.

Happenings

• I went to the baptist church 3 families at work attend this past Sunday. I have been there a few times already this summer and last but never for Sunday morning and Sunday school. A girl from work invited me and it was wonderful. Sunday school dealt with the same section of scripture and story that my religion prof taught on, so it was interesting to hit it from a different angle. The service was different than what I am used to but I loved the sermon and hymns and really all of it. The fellowship is outstanding there. I got to see many familiar faces, both those I work with and ones I have met there before. They are always inviting and so sweet which makes me feel very loved. I will definitely be back!
• One of my favorites and I found out we share the same favorite hymn, “It Is Well With My Soul.” Love that and her!
• Father’s day was spent with my dad and my grandpa on my mom’s side. We went to one of the best restaurants around imo. I didn’t get my usual panino and instead branched out! It was a great time.
• Ate out for dinner 3 days in a row and completely rocked it. Tuesday we went to a sandwich place, yesterday Mexican, and today I had pizza. I got what I wanted and didn’t freak out or anything. I feel way calmer now going to restaurants. Now I have to work more on variety and not scouring the menu ahead of time, but I really have made progress!
• I’ve been listening to hymns more instead of typical contemporary Christian and its been a nice change.

Ramblings

• Men are so ridiculous when it comes to pads, tampons, etc!! We were servicing the other day and one of the guys visibly freaked out upon seeing some unused tampons under a sink. They don’t bite and aren’t dirty or gross. I think maybe men just choose not to think about periods and avoid anything to do with them? It’s annoying but also really funny to watch, considering the same boy that was scared by some tampons killed a huge wasp no problem.