I feel like I blinked and January is 2/3 of the way over and my interim class ends tomorrow. I have had so much (too much?) free time, and yet haven’t been able to write a single blog post this year. I’m hoping that the rest of 2019 is a whole lot more prolific post-wise than the first 22 days have been.
The lack of posts isn’t due to having nothing to write about. There’s always at least 5 ideas running through my head. Instead, I once again have this perfectionist voice that is loud every time I’ve sat down to write. It whispers (or sometime screams) things like: you aren’t that interesting, you’re not doing well enough in recovery, that story doesn’t matter, this would show how broken you are, what if there’s a typo and you sound stupid. Having to fight these thoughts quickly kills my interest in blogging. My drafts are filled up with more half written posts and the blog stays stagnant.
One intention of the new year is to treat blogging differently. I want to be able to share again about what’s going on without freaking out too much if I have minor grammatical errors or if a post doesn’t do so well in terms of views/comments/likes. I hope to be honest about where I’m at because recovery and life in general is not perfect. My ultimate goal is to have blogging as an outlet again because I miss it.
I will be back soon, I really do promise this time 🙂